All posts in the Time category

Laughterholics Anonymous, Seymour Mace and the True Fist Lion Egg Cup of Destiny.

Published May 12, 2012 by jefflantern

So a lovely time was had by all last night at this wonderful comedy night in South Shields which was celebrating it’s first birthday! a credit to the promotional skills of Luke Milford and the supportive audience at Laughter Holics.

Jeff was particularly pleased to finally meet one of his comedy heroes Seymour Mace, pictured here modelling Jeffs fabled ‘True Fist Lion Egg Cup of Destiny” (An item of power very few are priviliged to hold, never mind eat an egg out of”)

As ever, Jeffs Stall was the clear highlight of the evening and Jeff also enjoyed helping a pair of foxy local babes free themselves from the oppresive delusion of time. They than demanded to be photographed with Jeff while wearing Jeffs special watches which will soon be available from Jeffs Stall.

One of Jeffs special watches which reminds us that (to a certain extent) the present moment is all we have and we can choose to define it how we want. As modelled here by Jeffs close friend the Superstar DJ David Guetta.

Heres to another succesful year at LaughterHolics! I’ll see if I can get Dave to DJ the next one 🙂



Published March 6, 2012 by jefflantern

Happy 65th day of the year to you!

Whats that? You’re still living your life by the cycle of the moon?


The moon revolves around us, she is our bitch, so why should we be her ‘Timeslave’?

So if you wish to join me, and liberate yourself from being restrained by the Lunar Cycle,
I have made a handy PDF you can print off and keep to identify what day of the year it is! (please note, you still need to know what month it is)

Love, hugs and gentle awakening of your Sacral Chakra! (the sex one.)

Jeff xx

Download PDF here

Moon Cycle Freedom

The Time is Fantastic

Published February 12, 2012 by jefflantern

Free yourself from the oppressive delusion of ‘time’, while also reminding yourself the present moment* is fantastic! by sticking a childs reward sticker on your watch face!

You can also customize this design depending on whether you want time to be good, very good, great or excellent!

Please note the Jeff Lanterns Truth Explosion customised fun-watch is not very useful if you actually want to know what the time is.

In these circumstances, Jeff recommends wearing another watch on your other arm. That way, if someone asks you the time you can say ‘do you want to know what THE time is? or what time is?

* Please note, If you would like to find out more about how to live in the present moment which is all we ever have, the writings of Jon Kabat Zinn are less patronising than Eckhart Tolle.